Life, as it is

It wasn’t a good idea, it wasn’t a good idea at all. In the end what was I left with? What good did I get out of it? What did I get besides a hole in my chest and tears rolling down my cheeks?

I guess I did get one thing out of this, understanding. I understood the situation very clear now that all words were said. What this was, it wasn’t like how I saw it, and it was very different.

Actions, some say actions speak louder than words. It doesn’t mean you should use your actions to tell someone something. That’s why you have a mouth and a god damn voice box.

Actions are misleading. I took your actions the wrong way and look where I ended up. At first I thought it wasn’t possible. At first I was only slightly into the fact that you would be the last person to disappoint me. I thought wrong because I saw wrong.

Your actions towards me were stronger than ever and so I jumped to conclusions which were a bad idea. I disappointed myself in the end.

I understand why it never works out for me, it’s because I never say anything and when I do, it’s either there’s no response or something stupid just has to happen and ruin my happiness.

I understand this situation very well. I know what I’m supposed to do. I should back off but I always do that when I find out such things.

You’re someone I can trust, you’re someone I can rely on and you’re a really good friend. I had once had a good friend who I could lean on and run to when ever something happened. He was always there for me. Soon after the relationship took a turn and I thought for the better.

I was wrong.

Now it’s me and you. What will happen once my emotions are spilt? I don’t want to ruin what you have with her and I don’t want to give you trouble but I just really want you to know especially now that I know how you feel and that your eyes aren’t on me like how mine is on you.

I gave you my thoughts, I gave you my trust, trust that you would be the last person I’d cry for. I was wrong. I haven’t cried over the opposite sex in a while. You got me crying. I really must like you huh?