I'm Ted

I don’t get it. When ever something goes good for you, something bad happens to others around you. When something bad happens to you, everybody is out there having the time of their lives.

Do you ever ask yourself; What kind of person are you really? Do you ask that? The answer is clear. I don’t know. Some say I’m the good guy in the story. Others see me as the evil one, which is apparently a good thing because it suits me.

I’m sort of someone who hopes too much. I read too many stories. I watch too many movies. I wish too much and I dream way too much. Fantasy, that’s what I believe I am living in. I’m a big fantasist or how others put it, a hopeless romantic.

Indeed I am.

Why is there such a big difference between primary and high school for me? Back then, I hated the fact that I was always chased during our tiggy games. I had always out run them. Is that why? Is it because I didn’t want to be chased in primary that’s why I had no one to chase me in high school? Tiggy in high school, such fun memories. I can relate my fantasy world to the game tiggy.

In primary, I was hardly “it”. I was always the one who had to run away from those who chased me. I ran so fast, they just gave up. They never even gave it their best shot.

In high school, for some reason I was always “it”. If I wasn’t “it” then I’d be sitting around, waiting to be chased. Those who were “it” never even saw me, they ran right past me.

I hated it, I hated chasing, I hated being not seen. I hated high school. Those days, I remember the first guy I chased for an entire half year or more. I ran around the school just so I can see him. I walked his path just so I can stare dreamily at his back.

I guess he didn’t like the game of tiggy.

That was a big mistake. A mistake I made even though I knew it was a mistake. After all you wouldn’t know it’s a mistake unless you make the mistake that way you’ll know that you made a mistake.

TED: No it’s not an adventure it’s a mistake.

LILY: Okay yes, it’s a mistake. I know it’s a mistake but there’s certain things in life where you know it’s a mistake but you really don’t know that it’s a mistake because the only way to know that it’s a mistake is to make the mistake and look back and say ‘yupp, that was a mistake’ so really, the bigger mistake would be to not make the mistake because then you’d go your whole life not really knowing whether something is a mistake or not and dammit I’ve made no mistakes. I’ve done all of this, my life, my relationship, my career, mistake free. Does any of this made sense to you?

TED: I don’t know, you said mistake a lot.

TED: It’s a mistake I’m gonna make.